There Goes Education Funds
A lawmaker in the state of Ohio has had enough of the talk about how his fellow lawmakers feel that casino gambling is a good idea for the state. Representative Barney Fructon wants these state lawmakers to put their money where their mouths are.

Fructon is proposing that the state try to gamble its way out of a budget crisis. His way, however, is a little unconventional. Fructon does not want to expand gambling, he wants to take $100 million of state money and go to a Las Vegas casino in the hopes of doubling or tripling the $100 million.

"I feel that it would be in the best interest of the state to take $100 million and go play slot machines in a Las Vegas casino for a weekend," said Fructon, "If we win, we lower taxes in the state. If we lose, well, if we lose, taxpayers in the state are fu**ed."

The Bill that he has proposed to fellow legislators would allow for $100 million once a month to be withdrawn from state funds. Fructon and a chosen group of ten to twenty lawmakers would then board a plane and be treated like high rollers once they landed in Las Vegas.

No expense would be spared, and whatever the lawmakers won on their weekend in Vegas, would go back into the state budget come Monday. Fructon believes this is a much better way of getting out of a financial crisis than authorizing casinos. The casinos, he believes, is like a double whammy for residents of Ohio.

"If we build casinos, the residents of our state still have to pay taxes," said Fructon, "then, they would lose more money in the casinos which would go to the state, so in essence, they would be getting double fu**ed. Under this plan, we would only stick it to them once."

The plan is receiving heavy support from lawmakers who have for years had secret gambling problems. Representative Barry Whitewater believes the plan would be a way for him to gamble without spending his own money, and others believe the plan would actually increase productibility in the state government.

"Right now, we (lawmakers) are couped up in an office building, doing battle with each other,' said Senator Ryan Berk, "I think we would get a lot more Bills passed for the state if we were all drunk and in a casino. That is, after all, where the best negotiations in history have taken place."

Although the support inside government has been strong, the church groups have already come out in opposition of the Bill. They claim that they just heard the word gambling on television in association with a law, and felt they had to immediately oppose.

When asked what they were opposing, many of the members of the church group we polled had no idea.

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